cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (RIDICULOUSSSS SSSSNAKE THRONE)
Cobra Commander ([personal profile] cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa) wrote2013-12-29 07:04 pm

82 | Video

[Apparently Cobra Commander's going for theatrics with his broadcast today since he's sitting in the giant snake throne he got a couple years back. His faceplate's back on since whoever stole it decided to return it. Which is something he'll probably want to deal with later, but not today. No, today's video is going to be focusing on something much more important.]

In my world, there exissssts a form of military strategy known as mutually assured destruction, which operates under the assumption that if one side strikes the other, both will be wiped out. For the last few months, this has been the ssssituation with myself and with Team Rocket. But sssuch a strategy can only last for so long, so ssssooner or later we were bound to come to some sort of agreement.

[From the side of his chair, Cobra produces a bunch of papers, none of which are close enough to the camera to be readable, and admittedly don't say anything sensible at all really. Just pages and pages of random sentences, but from this distance, it should look official enough.]

I won't bore you all with the details, but in exchange for returning most of their property, I've been granted immunity from further reprisals. Notice I ssssaid most of their property. Contrary to what ssssome of you may think, I am not stupid enough to hand over my only bargaining chip and trussst the word of Team Rocket.

[Yeah, let's just...try and stop the questioning of Cobra's intelligence before it starts this time. Probably won't work, but he tried.]

And just as I am not ssstupid enough to completely trust them, they are not ssstupid enough to trust me. But being a man of my word, I encourage them to, if they feel I've tampered with their rockets in any way, to test them out as sssssoon as possible. And if they choose to test them out on the rest of you, then I can hardly be held responssssible for their choice of targets. Or if I choose to take advantage of the chaossss caused by said tests to further my own ends.

[And there's the end of the public feed, followed by an incredibly short Rocket broadcast a few moments later.]

[Video. Locked to Rockets.]
To those with their assignments, you may begin your final preparations.

{OOC: Still have two targets here if anyone's interested!}
uncagedforjustamoment: Are you by chance related to an Uchiha? (You're an idiot and I dislike you.)

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[personal profile] uncagedforjustamoment 2014-01-01 09:48 pm (UTC)(link)
[Snakes of course remind Neji of Orochimaru. This person is a rather pathetic imitation of the legendary terror. And far too talkative.]

Perhaps you should refrain from speaking of intelligence while you share unnecessary tactical information with the world at large.
uncagedforjustamoment: I'm not even running for hokage (I do not approve of this message)

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[personal profile] uncagedforjustamoment 2014-01-01 10:25 pm (UTC)(link)
You also underestimate your potential enemies casually.

[He's determined to ruin days.]
uncagedforjustamoment: Are you by chance related to an Uchiha? (You're an idiot and I dislike you.)

[audio]

[personal profile] uncagedforjustamoment 2014-01-03 11:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Then you're far too arrogant.
uncagedforjustamoment: Keep your sexual exploits to yourself (That's not even natural)

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[personal profile] uncagedforjustamoment 2014-01-07 07:41 am (UTC)(link)
An excuse to be makes you no less arrogant, and your collapse no less imminent.
uncagedforjustamoment: Improve your sense of humor (You're not serious?)

[audio]

[personal profile] uncagedforjustamoment 2014-01-08 04:39 am (UTC)(link)
Indeed. It's impending.
uncagedforjustamoment: But then, they already have (Things are about to go badly for you)

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[personal profile] uncagedforjustamoment 2014-01-08 05:00 am (UTC)(link)
Be careful. There's only one other option.
ortion: (❀ contemplating)

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[personal profile] ortion 2014-01-04 06:32 am (UTC)(link)
Quite ahead of you, Commander. I believe I'll be beginning my trip to Olivine within the next day or two.

[... You know, now that he's thinking about it.]

Commander, I meant to ask you something. Do you have the time for a quick chat?
ortion: pixiv id 26766725 (❀ just no)

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[personal profile] ortion 2014-01-05 07:23 am (UTC)(link)
Good.

[Okay, now that Cobra's agreed to this, Dist's expression turns very sullen.]

Now, you know that I support you to a degree. I am even assisting you in this little assault planned.

That said, I'd like for you to explain what in the world happened last month. You were visiting the base, we chatted and you promised to meet back up with me and the labs, but you never came! You left the base and effectively left me hanging in the process!

I wanted to bring this up sooner but never had the right opportunity, so here it is now. I thought you were interested in the work I was doing for you, but I am honestly very disappointed about all of this.
ortion: pixiv id 5647454 (❀ oh please tell me more)

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[personal profile] ortion 2014-01-05 08:22 am (UTC)(link)
[Oh that's so hilarious, Cobra. But Dist's not laughing, and he's certainly not accepting that answer.]

I don't like when people lie to me, Commander. It could only have been you. I would recognize your mask and voice any day!
ortion: (❀ oh my goodnessss)

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[personal profile] ortion 2014-01-05 10:18 pm (UTC)(link)
Yes, that's the one...why are you asking?

[Basically, both parties are extremely confused right now.]
ortion: (❀ duped)

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[personal profile] ortion 2014-01-06 05:23 am (UTC)(link)
Wh-- I-It wasn't...?

[Dist falls silent, trying to process that. His expression quickly shifts from confusion to mild horror because he realizes he's been duped pretty badly.]

You have got to be kidding me.
ortion: pixiv id 26766725 (❀ just no)

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[personal profile] ortion 2014-01-09 05:02 am (UTC)(link)
[He considers that question, and his expression remains grim because none of the possibilities are good ones.]

Think, Commander. If they were able to impersonate you, they had full access to the base. Whoever it was effectively infiltrated the base and spied on us without our knowledge.
ortion: (❀ SO VULGAR)

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[personal profile] ortion 2014-01-10 04:33 am (UTC)(link)
[He's going to instantly get defensive about this because what the hell, don't turn this around on him.]

Because I just now discovered it wasn't you! Of course it's more important!

[He tries to regain his composure so he can think clearly. This is obviously bad, but they have no way of finding out who it actually was..]

I'll have to find out if anyone else came across that imposter wandering the halls that day. Perhaps the security cameras captured them as well...