[Today, we have a video of Cobra Commander actually out in the field working on catching the thing every Rocket's supposed to be out there catching. But that's not what he's here to talk about. Because while everybody is supposed to be doing the Rocket thing, he actually has another Rocket thing to talk about.
And he's not talking about what happened over the weekend. As far as he's concerned nothing happened.]
I hope I'm not dissstracting you from this ridiculousss endeavor, but as sssome of you may have noticed, we've lost a few of our higher ranked comrades lately. Unlesss I am incredibly missstaken about our lossesss, thisss provides a wonderful opportunity for the ressst of you to disstinguish yourselves and climb the ranks. And regardlessss of how this turns out, I would hope that none of you choose to overlook this chance.
[Go out there guys, he believes in you.
Okay, no, he doesn't. He just wants more higher ranked people who are willing to invent or help him get whatever ridiculous thing he wants. But he's not that transparent, is he?]
And sssomeone catch that thing already! No Pokemon ssshould take thisss long to catch!