cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (NOT AGAIN WHY DOES THISSS KEEP HAPPENING)
[Yep, it's Cobra again. But wait, don't touch that dial because today is actually the day he does stuff! Which might become obvious because when the video starts he seems to be...in the air, standing on some sort of metal thing. So yep, stuff's happening today.

Now, in theory, he should probably be preoccupied with the Rocket text that went out a couple days ago, but he's not postponing his plans just because the admins decided they want them all to do things. He's Cobra Commander, and he does things on his schedule, not anyone else's.

Unless of course they force him to stick to their schedule, but that's not the point today!]


I thought that this time...thissss time, you all might have actually understood what I was up to and had the ssssense to meet my demands. Obvioussssly, I was wrong.

[Wow, Cobra actually admitted he was wrong.]

So sssince no one seems to understand what a game changer my device is, allow me to provide the final demonstration of Project M.E.T.A.L.'s power!

[Cobra steps towards the edge of the platform and...that sure is the Cherrygrove Spa down there. Yup.]

Lock On!

[There's no visible effect or anything, but the Magnezones under the platform have locked on to their target.]

Fire!

[And suddenly six Zap Cannons rain down, all hitting the target and pretty much wrecking that poor spa. Nobody's getting any treatments there any time soon, that's for sure.]

I trust that you now underssstand the power I possess!

[He'll just back away from the edge now.]

But it's an underssstanding that has come far too late! Because you've failed to meet my demands, the ressst of Cherrygrove City can expect the sssame fate!

[From somewhere behind Cobra, there's a weird detaching noise followed by the sound of something falling and then um...impacting the ruins of the spa.]

What?!

[He'll just disconnect the feed there. No sense in showing the whole world what went wrong and ruining any villain cred he's just gained.]

{OOC: The log for the people wrecking the machine is here! Have fun guys!

And responses to this might be slow over the next couple of days due to my laptop needing repairs, but I'll try be around as much as I can!

And yes, the damage to the spa was approved by Alex and Sunny!}

94 | Video

Nov. 17th, 2014 01:27 pm
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (SSSSEATBELTS ARE FOR LOSERS)
[Cobra's off in what appears to be a wooded area today. There's a house off to the side which...doesn't really do much to identify where he is, but still, a house!]

Greetings citizens of Johto, Kanto. It's been ssssome time since I've had reason to addresssss you all like this.

[Technically, he just made a broadcast last month, but that's not really what he's talking about. ...but on a possibly related note, it has been a few months since he attacked that news station.

And he's still showing off that house in the background. Look, he rented it. He wants you all to see what he does with his money.]


Over the years certain individuals, myssself among them, have perpetrated various acts of violence and terrorism on thissss world, usually utilizing either Pokemon...or more conventional methods, ssssuch as that little war waged in Ecruteak the other day.

[Or maybe it wasn't so little, doesn't really matter. Cobra wants to talk about Cobra and his accomplishments today, not what that “Seth” guy is doing over in Ecruteak.]

Sssso I've decided that it's time to try something new. A blending of conventional weaponry and Pokemon as it were. A project I've dubbed Project M.E.T.A.L.!

[Magnetic Emission Tactical Assault Laser, if anyone's curious and doesn't feel like asking. A fancy name for...shooting things with Magnezones. Or what are going to one day be Magnezones.]

Of course, at this point, we all know that actions ssssspeak far louder than words, sssso I've arranged for a little demonstration.

[Okay, so now the house is going to come into play, since Cobra's focusing on it with the camera.]

Ready...aim...fire!

[And from off camera comes a beam of some sort that's uh...well, if anyone's seen Flash Cannon, sort of like that. Except it's a bit larger since it's about six of them aligned to fire together and impact the wall of that house.

...the house that he rented just to do this. Yup. This is what Cobra Commander does with his money.

With that demonstration done, he'll switch to audio until he gets over there, so enjoy the background music for the Mahogany area and the sound of Cobra walking for a moment.

Okay, it's live again and there's a lovely view of the wrecked wall as well as the interior of the room behind the wall which looks blasted all to hell. It could be worse, but suffice to say, he is not getting his deposit back. But enough about that, he's going to turn the camera to himself so he can address everyone personally.]


No doubt ssssome of you are unimpressed. But consider thisss a taste of things to come. The finished product will be much more devastating, and I guarantee it will be unlike anything this world has ever ssssseen!

[And he'll just cackle into the camera before ending the feed because that's his usual way of ending these things.]

{OOC: So, as you some of you might have noticed, Cobra's been mentioning that he's been working on something for the last few months. This is part of it! When it's all finished in a couple of months or so, there'll definitely be more information on it and the chance to foil his stupid evil, okay mostly stupid, plan. So this is basically phase one of a much larger stupid thing.

And this was mod approved by Sunny and Alex!}
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (MY LIFE'S STORY IN ONE SPEECH BUBBLE)
These crystals are far, far too dangerous to be left here where anyone can get use them.

[Cobra turns the camera away from Fuchsia City's crystal that he was focusing on and towards himself. His slightly charred self. Guess who's been trying to figure out how these things work via trial and error? And it's been mostly error. Yup, lots and lots of explosive errors.]

Therefore, I've taken it upon mysssself to personally see to it that they don't fall into the wrong hands! Whose hands are those? Pretty much anyone's hands that aren't mine!

[...that part probably wasn't a surprise to anyone. What might be a surprise to the viewer though is what Cobra pans away and up to what appears to be...quite a few Magnezones using their magnetic powers to levitate quite a few Steelixes above the crystal.

Amazing what one can do by pulling rank on some NPC Grunts and taking advantage of the general craziness.]


As you can see, I've put together enough firepower to easily take down thissss crystal! And once that's done, I'll move on to all the others! And then the remains will be gathered up and-

[Cobra's cut off as the first Steelix gets essentially launched into the crystal.]

No! Sssstop! Ssstop! I didn't give the order yet! Sssstop it!

[They're not stopping.]

I sssssaaid ssssstop!

[The feed ends there.

But for anyone in Fuchsia City, Cobra's still standing in front of the crystal, shrieking at the Pokemon to do as he says...and occasionally dodging chunks of crystal sent flying by the bombardment. This isn't even remotely how he wanted this to go. And yet somehow, this isn't exactly a new experience for him either.]
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (SSSSEATBELTS ARE FOR LOSERS)
[Video A]
[Today’s the 8th. That means another video (or three) from Cobra. He’s standing next to a building in Pallet Town wearing what appears to be a winter coat despite the fact that it’s May. And he doesn’t seem to be very happy about his demands being met.]

I had thought that the threat of complete annihilation would be enough to get what I want. Apparently, I was wrong. Apparently mere words are not enough to convince you all to make the right decisions even when those words come from someone such as myself. Sssso since I failed to convince you with words, you now leave me no choice but to offer a demonstration of what I’m capable of.

[And with that, Cobra produces a small remote from his pocket and pushes a button.]

Keep an eye on your PokéGears. Ssssoon you shall have proof that my threats were far from empty!

[Video B]
[About fifteen minutes after the first broadcast ends, there’s a second video from Cobra. Same location as before, but there appears to be some sort of freak storm going on. Hail, lightning, high winds, and even some snow. Cobra’s keeping his Pokémon off screen and separated in order to make it look as natural as possible. Or well as natural as a freak ice storm in early May can be.

And the whole time this is going on, Cobra’s cackling like an idiot again. Unfortunately, this goes on for quite a while before he cuts the feed.]


[Video C]
[Tired of Cobra yet? Yes? Too bad. There’s a third video sometime later, showing the aftermath of the storm. Nothing’s leveled or anything like that, but the Pokémon equivalent of Home Depot is probably going to be pretty busy over the next couple weeks or so.]

Take a good look at thisss! Take a good look and remember that next time, it will be wor-

[Okay, hang on, there’s something off screen taking up most of Cobra’s attention.]

Under arrest? Is thissss some sort of joke? You dare arrest me?

[After several minutes of arguing and trying to threaten his way out of this, Cobra’s finally handcuffed.]

You can’t do thissss to me! You’ll pay for thissss! I have rights! I want a lawyer! You’ll pay for thisss!

[And with that, Cobra’s final video for the day comes to a close.]

{OOC: Okay, here’s the attack/arrest that goes with this. Just let me know which video(s) are being responded to. If anyone’s actually in Pallet Town, feel free to encounter Cobra or one of his Pokemon. He has Castform, Vanilluxe, Electrode, Drifblim, Gyarados, and Abomasnow with him.

Additionally, responses to Video C will be coming from Cobra's jail cell!}

70 | Video

May. 1st, 2013 06:44 pm
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (I BELIEVE THISSS CALLS FOR A SSSSPEECH)
Greetings, people of the world.

[Behind Cobra Commander, there appears to be some sort of tarp covered object. There’s no real uniform shape to it, and the tarp does a wonderful job concealing the fact that it’s just a bunch of boxes and assorted junk he’s cobbled together to create the impression that there’s something else under there.]

I assume that many of you are wondering what thisss object behind me is? Well, wonder no longer! Thisss is what will not only assure my victory over the world, but also will be the final argument to convince ssssome of you that I, Cobra Commander, am indeed someone you should all fear!

You see, thanks to ssssome of the greatest minds to ever inhabit this place, I finally have a device capable of harnessing the forces of nature themselves! Think about that means! The weather itself is mine to command! And mine to use against my enemies!

[And it’s the same for anyone else with access to certain Pokémon attacks, but Cobra’s hoping the tarp will distract people from thinking about that.]

But I have no interest in ruling over a frozen or flooded planet. Therefore, I’ll give you all one chance to sssspare yourselves such a fate. Simply turn over one-third of all the eggs in both Johto and Kanto to me and you won’t have to experience the full power of thisss weapon! Refuse and suffer the consequences!

I will give you one week to decide! One week!

{OOC: There’s more information about this here!}
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (SSSSEATBELTS ARE FOR LOSERS)
[When the feed clicks on, there’s uh, this thing. Don’t worry though, Johto hasn’t been invaded by aliens from the planet where color coordination and fashion go to die, it’s just Cobra Commander. Which should be clear once he starts talking.]

People of Johto, today is a truly momentous occasion. Today, I ssset my sights much higher than I have in the past, and what I accomplish today will never be forgotten! Ever! Behold!

[And he’ll turn the camera now to show off his Skarmory, which everyone has probably seen before. But today, it’s a little different. There’s a few oddly dressed pilots hanging around it, rigging some sort of harness to it. The crazy man in the spacesuit might not be their Commander, but this is hardly the first time that they’ve seen a new Cobra Commander. Attached to the harness seem to be a number of Pokeballs which were drafted into Cobra’s service instead of being kept by the Star-Vipers, each one containing another flying Pokemon.

But enough about that, he’s spent too much time filming things that aren’t him, so he’ll turn the camera back to his helmet now.]


I suggest you all keep an eye on the sssky, because I plan to leave quite the impression on it! One that will last forever!

[And what would a Cobra Commander broadcast be without the customary cackling to close out the video?]

{OOC: SO

Cobra’s plan is to do this. OBVIOUSLY, THIS WILL NOT GO AS PLANNED. Feel free to jump in whenever whether it be during the prep, after takeoff, or in between failed attempts. He’ll be responding to the Gear during flights too. Just let me know when!

Oh, and he is armed, but uh, his lasers will hilariously miss anything that isn't a vehicle.}
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (COBRAAAAAAAAAAAA ATTAAAAAAACK)
[As if the Pokémon Centers being destroyed yesterday wasn’t enough chaos, Cobra Commander’s decided to launch an attack of his own today. The video feed displays the entrance to the Saffron City Gym, and no, he didn’t ice over someone’s door again. Instead, a Hyper Beam from somewhere behind the camera blasts the doors open. And if the Gear signal wasn’t enough evidence as to the attacker’s identity, Cobra Commander yelling orders probably is.]

Excellent! Now that the entrance is breached, attack! Attack!

[Several of Cobra’s more loyal Pokémon, like Arbok, Abomasnow, and Skarmory can be seen heading through what’s left of the doors before the feed cuts out.]

{OOC: Network responses will be during the attack, and for action, feel free to confront him either inside the Gym where he’s making a mess of things or while he’s trying to make an escape. Just let me know which one!}

10 | Video

Aug. 9th, 2010 02:52 pm
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (Telling you about my ridiculous scheme)
[The video feed displays a nondescript room inside Rocket HQ. The camera is shaking around and occasionally drops higher or lower as Cobra Commander stands in front of it wearing his regular “definitely not a Rocket Grunt uniform” outfit.]

Attention citizens of Johto! I am Cobra Commander! This broadcast is to publicly thank those of you who so graciously provided me with information on Pokémon evolution. Soon my Ekans will evolve into Arbok and there’s nothing any of you can do about it! Nothing!

[This prompts some maniacal laughter from the masked man and seems to startle the person filming. The camera shakes around a bit taking the focus away from Cobra Commander, which of course angers him.]

Give me that back you idiot! This broadcast is over! Give it back you stupid Pokémon!

[There's a flash of purple before the feed goes black as the camera is yanked away from Ekans.]

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