96 | Video

Dec. 23rd, 2014 11:22 am
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (RECIPE FOR DISSSASTER)
[For those who are watching and have been to Cinnabar Island, the subject of Cobra's video is that construction site that's been constructing ever since Kanto became available all those years ago. ...or before that who knows? For those who've never been there, it's a construction site in a mysterious location. Which appears to be closed for the day.]

When we last ssssspoke like this, I demonstrated my latest innovation for all of you.

[...yup, he sure is pretending the tantrum that happened in between this and that didn't happen.]

And I believe I mentioned that the finished product would be far more devastating. Fortunately for you all, that day has not yet come.

[Soon though, at the rate this is going.]

Sssso today, I've arranged a second demonstration of Project M.E.T.A.L. for your viewing pleasure. So without further delay, fire!

[And from off camera, there's a barrage of Zap Cannons that...sort of whites out the view for a moment. When the feed resumes with an amazing shot of the ground, Cobra picks the camera back up to show...well, some of that construction equipment's definitely wrecked. There's a decent sized gouge in the ground where one of the blasts went off target, and who knows where some of the other ones went. Curse that 50% accuracy.]

I believe that was should be considered far more impressive than merely knocking down a wall as some of you put it before. And jussst remember! The worst is yet to come!

[The public feed ends there, and a few minutes later, there's a private feed on the Rocket channel.]
Private Video on the Rocket Frequency )

{OOC: So this is part two of the thing Cobra's been working on. He's still ICly putting things together at this point, but in January, you can expect an OOC post with information about what exactly he's doing and how you guys can ruin his plans for him! So keep an eye out for that if you're interested!}

82 | Video

Dec. 29th, 2013 07:04 pm
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (RIDICULOUSSSS SSSSNAKE THRONE)
[Apparently Cobra Commander's going for theatrics with his broadcast today since he's sitting in the giant snake throne he got a couple years back. His faceplate's back on since whoever stole it decided to return it. Which is something he'll probably want to deal with later, but not today. No, today's video is going to be focusing on something much more important.]

In my world, there exissssts a form of military strategy known as mutually assured destruction, which operates under the assumption that if one side strikes the other, both will be wiped out. For the last few months, this has been the ssssituation with myself and with Team Rocket. But sssuch a strategy can only last for so long, so ssssooner or later we were bound to come to some sort of agreement.

[From the side of his chair, Cobra produces a bunch of papers, none of which are close enough to the camera to be readable, and admittedly don't say anything sensible at all really. Just pages and pages of random sentences, but from this distance, it should look official enough.]

I won't bore you all with the details, but in exchange for returning most of their property, I've been granted immunity from further reprisals. Notice I ssssaid most of their property. Contrary to what ssssome of you may think, I am not stupid enough to hand over my only bargaining chip and trussst the word of Team Rocket.

[Yeah, let's just...try and stop the questioning of Cobra's intelligence before it starts this time. Probably won't work, but he tried.]

And just as I am not ssstupid enough to completely trust them, they are not ssstupid enough to trust me. But being a man of my word, I encourage them to, if they feel I've tampered with their rockets in any way, to test them out as sssssoon as possible. And if they choose to test them out on the rest of you, then I can hardly be held responssssible for their choice of targets. Or if I choose to take advantage of the chaossss caused by said tests to further my own ends.

[And there's the end of the public feed, followed by an incredibly short Rocket broadcast a few moments later.]

[Video. Locked to Rockets.]
To those with their assignments, you may begin your final preparations.

{OOC: Still have two targets here if anyone's interested!}
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (SSSSEATBELTS ARE FOR LOSERS)
[Well, here's Cobra Commander again, looking to be in a slightly better mood than he was when he accidentally outed himself as a Rocket. He's really not happy at all since somehow his faceplate disappeared over that weird missing stretch of time, and there was that weird tornado...

Oh well, he'll make due with his hood for now, and be thankful the tornado didn't wreck his plans.]


No doubt by now news of my...blown cover has become widespread. As well as a missing shipment of...ssssomething. For those of you who may have missed it, I'll explain. I was conveniently videotaped discussing a number of important things relating to a missing shipment of something belonging to Team Rocket. Which of course connects mysssself to that group, a connection I've tried my hardest to deny.

But it's one I sssee absolutely no reason to deny any longer. Yessss, I am, or was, a member of Team Rocket, and yesss, a shipment I was in charge of disappeared. It has ssssince been recovered.

[The feed goes black there, but it hasn't ended, Cobra's just turning off the camera for a moment. The audio's not much of note. Just the sound of footsteps and a door opening. When the feed turns back on, it's Cobra. In a basement. Still not much worth seeing.]

Recovered by me. And I won't be returning it. In fact, it was never lost at all! The entire thing, including the video was sssset up by me! Why you ask? Because quite honestly I am tired of serving in an organization that doesn't value my contributions and decided I would be better off going into business for myself on a more permanent basis. And to protect myself from any future reprisals, I took that shipment as an insurance package!

[And now he'll turn the camera to reveal um...well. It appears to be an open crate with several white missiles inside it. All of which are painted with a red R. Yeah. It took a while to get Ditto and Zorua to get them to look just right, but they really do look just like the real thing!]

I won't go into sssspecifics such as payload or guidance systems since I doubt any of that means much to most of you, but I will say that those are exactly what they look like. Prototype rockets for Team Rocket! That belong to me now!

[And he'll just end the feed there. Okay, there might actually be a few minutes of villainous laughter before it actually ends.]

{OOC: Explanation is here!

66 | Video

Dec. 30th, 2012 09:54 pm
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (MANIACAL LAUGH)
[Today’s video shows one side of a room, with donation boxes lined up along the wall. The same boxes that for the past few weeks have been out on the streets, just sitting there in the hopes that people will contribute something to help the needy. And after the recent legendary rampage, there’s certainly a lot more need for such a thing than there was before.

Too bad that the contents aren’t going to anyone deserving, which might be clear once Cobra steps on screen.]


By now these should look familiar to mosssst of you. Several of these boxes were left in various areas, in the hopes that ssssomeone would contribute their hard earned money or items in a misssguided attempt to help those less fortunate. While such actions are typically considered noble by ssssociety, this was nothing more than stupidity on your parts!

And why, you may ask, was it ssstupid? Because! None of these items are going to charity! And before any of you accuse me of theft, they never were! I haven’t ssstolen anything! Merely collected the receptacles I had delivered in the firsssst place! That’s right. There’s no benevolent company or charitable organization behind this! There never was! The entire thing was always a Cobra operation!

[There’s no cackling here since apparently Cobra has more to say.]

But I couldn’t have done thisss alone. No, of course not. Which is why in return for their excellent assistance, I will be making a rather large donation to Team Rocket. The donation will of course, come from the proceeds so generously donated to Cobra by all of you. And that is something I want all of you to think about.

Think about what your charity and ssso called Christmas ssspirit have gotten you! Or perhaps I should say what it will get you! The answer, for those of you too ssstupid to figure it out, is more acts of terror! Acts of terror funded by your generous donations! Perhaps next time you’ll think twice before deciding to help sssssomeone! After all, they could just be exploiting your compassion and generosity like I did!

[And now there’s the obligatory evil laughter to end Cobra’s broadcast.]

{OOC: And here’s the reveal of the scheme detailed in this post.}

65 | Video

Dec. 14th, 2012 07:54 pm
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (WHO LEFT THE DOOR OPEN AGAIN?)
Can you believe thissss nonsense?

[From the video, it looks like Cobra Commander’s wandered outside today to show everyone a box. Some people may have already seen them by now.]

Charity? Charity? I don’t know whose sssstupid idea this was, but I hope it fails! Collecting things for a good cause! Things like thissss sicken me! Who would be ssstupid enough to donate to charity?

[That should probably be enough to convince anyone that Cobra Commander is the last person who would be behind such a thing, but since when does Cobra have the sense to refrain from overdoing something?]

And if it wasn’t bad enough already, it’s Christmas charity! That’s even worse! Well, they’re not getting ssssso much as a cent from me! Ever! And I pity anyone ssstupid enough to give them anything!

[There. That should be enough, so he’ll end the feed there.]

{OOC: Post to go with this. Figured Cobra throwing a public fit about it would work better to distance himself from it.}
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (Telling you about my ridiculousss scheme)
Private Text to Gorthan )

{OOC: Just passing along some reports about the Commander's home world to Gorthan. He'll be posting publicly later on this week and probably next week too.}
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa: (Ssssssstanding there)
[The video feed displays a newly evolved Arbok slithering in the snow on Route 34, just outside Goldenrod City. The camera is a bit shaky since the Commander’s hands are unsteady due to it still being really cold outside. However, despite the weather he sounds ecstatic. ]

I did it! I finally did it! I told you all nothing could stop me! Remember that! I always get what I want! So don’t get in my way!

Private to Team Rocket )

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