79 | Video/Action | Fourth Wall

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

[Video]

[Surprise! There's a snake themed person broadcasting on Cobra's Gear today. But it really doesn't look or sound anything like Cobra. Say hello to Serpent-Man everybody.]

Greetings, citizens! I am Serpent-Man! And I believe in truth, justice, and the principles the Founding Fathers outlined in the United States Constitution! I'm a recent arrival to these parts, but I just wanted you all to know that my first act as a Pokemon Trainer was to apprehend the treacherous and evil Cobra Commander! I plan to immediately take him to the police, so that he can be properly tried and sentenced for his crimes, and given the rights given to such people by the Bill of Rights or its equivalent here!

[And that's it. Yeah. ]

[Action]
[Somehow Cobra Commander has apparently managed to escape from his earlier predicament, and after spotting that machine, proceeds to start running around looking for it. He doesn't have the faintest idea what it is, but that R means it's Team Rocket's, and if he recovers it, it might earn some points with them.

So he can basically be found anywhere, looking everywhere and through everything. Houses, businesses, trash cans, under rocks, and so on. That thing's got to be around here somewhere.]

{OOC: Most replies to the video will probably be coming from serpentmanaway!}

Comments

[makeyoupregnant]

[Somewhere behind you, Cobra, there is a ten year old girl hanging upside down from something (perhaps a tree, perhaps the ceiling, perhaps something else) and watching you.]

What'cha doing, mister?

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

Looking for something important! Go away!

[He's not even looking because he clearly doesn't have time for children and their nonsense.

Wait.]

...you wouldn't happen to have sssseen a machine around here would you? With a giant red R on it?

[makeyoupregnant]

A giant R...

[She thinks for a moment.]

Oh, yeah! There was something like that! A big shiny metal thing!

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

Where? Where was it? Tell me right now!

[makeyoupregnant]

It was just down that alley! I'll take you there if you do something for me.

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

And what would that be?

[He's stupid, but not quite stupid enough to just blindly agree to these terms.]

[makeyoupregnant]

You have to buy me some dango I can bring to my big sister!

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

I have absolutely no idea what that is!

[makeyoupregnant]

You don't know what dango is??

[this is a tragedy]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

I don't think I do.

[He'll actually think about that one for a second.]

Yessss, I'm certain that I have no idea what it is!

[makeyoupregnant]

Then you just have to try it! We can go get some together, mister! And then my big sister Ferris will praise me because I helped someone discover what dango is!

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

I don't want to discover what dango is! I want to find that machine! Just tell me how much it costs, so I can give you the money, and then you can tell me which alley you sssaw it in!

[makeyoupregnant]

You just haven't tried it yet! Come on, mister!

[She maaaay be attempting to grab your arm now...]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

[And he may be noticing that only after it's far too late.]

What? What are you doing? Unhand me at once! Let go!

[makeyoupregnant]

This way! I saw a dango shop this way earlier, mister!

[Walking to the dango shop, oh yeah~]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

I never agreed to thissss!

[And yet he's letting the small child drag him there.]

[makeyoupregnant]

[Iris has that effect on people :3

Eventually they reach a small shop selling skewers of dango.]

See? See? I told you! This is dango! It's really really good!

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

I'll take your word for it.

[Yeah, Cobra's not happy.]

Now how many of these am I supposed to buy in exchange for the location of the machine?

[makeyoupregnant]

Hmm... Ten boxes! One for me, eight for my big sister, and one for you to try!

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

I never agreed to buy you ten boxes! One box! Just one! And you can take it, then tell me what I want, and then leave me alone!

[makeyoupregnant]

No way! One box is nowhere near enough for my big sister!

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

I am buying one box and that's it!

[makeyoupregnant]

Ten boxes!

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

One! A sssssingle box!

[makeyoupregnant]

Ten or I'm not telling you anything!

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

Fine!

[Let's try negotiating.]

Two boxes then.

[makeyoupregnant]

Still not enough!

[But she sees where you're going...]

Mmmmmm... but maybe my big sister will forgive me if I only bring her seven boxes. So seven!

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

Two and a half!

[Do they even sell half a box?]

[makeyoupregnant]

[Probably not.]

Six.

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

[Darn.]

Three!

[makeyoupregnant]

Five!

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

No! Not five! Three!

[makeyoupregnant]

Five or no deal!

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

[He just sort of grumbles while trying not to say things that shouldn't be said to children.]

Four!

[makeyoupregnant]

Hmm...

[She makes a big deal about thinking this over... and then smiles.]

Okay, deal!

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

Fine! Four boxes!

[After even more grumbling, Cobra hands over the money for them.]

Now where was that machine?

[makeyoupregnant]

Thanks, mister! It was down that alley there, then you take the first left and then the second right from there.

[she points in the direction she's indicating]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

[And Cobra's running off to go check that now. No, he's not sticking around to try dango.]

[makeyoupregnant]

[Oh well, Iris tried. Surely her big sister will understand that the man was just stupid. And she'll praise her for bringing dango anyway, so.

Notably, she was telling the truth, though whether it's still there or not is completely up to its own whims.]