Cobra Commander (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa) wrote2013-05-01 06:44 pm
cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa) wrote2013-05-01 06:44 pm
70 | Video
Greetings, people of the world.
[Behind Cobra Commander, there appears to be some sort of tarp covered object. There’s no real uniform shape to it, and the tarp does a wonderful job concealing the fact that it’s just a bunch of boxes and assorted junk he’s cobbled together to create the impression that there’s something else under there.]
I assume that many of you are wondering what thisss object behind me is? Well, wonder no longer! Thisss is what will not only assure my victory over the world, but also will be the final argument to convince ssssome of you that I, Cobra Commander, am indeed someone you should all fear!
You see, thanks to ssssome of the greatest minds to ever inhabit this place, I finally have a device capable of harnessing the forces of nature themselves! Think about that means! The weather itself is mine to command! And mine to use against my enemies!
[And it’s the same for anyone else with access to certain Pokémon attacks, but Cobra’s hoping the tarp will distract people from thinking about that.]
But I have no interest in ruling over a frozen or flooded planet. Therefore, I’ll give you all one chance to sssspare yourselves such a fate. Simply turn over one-third of all the eggs in both Johto and Kanto to me and you won’t have to experience the full power of thisss weapon! Refuse and suffer the consequences!
I will give you one week to decide! One week!
{OOC: There’s more information about this here!}
[Behind Cobra Commander, there appears to be some sort of tarp covered object. There’s no real uniform shape to it, and the tarp does a wonderful job concealing the fact that it’s just a bunch of boxes and assorted junk he’s cobbled together to create the impression that there’s something else under there.]
I assume that many of you are wondering what thisss object behind me is? Well, wonder no longer! Thisss is what will not only assure my victory over the world, but also will be the final argument to convince ssssome of you that I, Cobra Commander, am indeed someone you should all fear!
You see, thanks to ssssome of the greatest minds to ever inhabit this place, I finally have a device capable of harnessing the forces of nature themselves! Think about that means! The weather itself is mine to command! And mine to use against my enemies!
[And it’s the same for anyone else with access to certain Pokémon attacks, but Cobra’s hoping the tarp will distract people from thinking about that.]
But I have no interest in ruling over a frozen or flooded planet. Therefore, I’ll give you all one chance to sssspare yourselves such a fate. Simply turn over one-third of all the eggs in both Johto and Kanto to me and you won’t have to experience the full power of thisss weapon! Refuse and suffer the consequences!
I will give you one week to decide! One week!
{OOC: There’s more information about this here!}
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[...Ishimaru.]
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[Ishimaru, he doesn't know what to say.
But that's only because he can't stop laughing. Sorry.]
You can't be that sssstupid! Justice never prevails against me! Never!
[Unless all those other times where it did count. If so, justice prevails on a regular basis.]
And rally against me if you want! It will only end in your defeat!
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And then Monobear happened. Now he's just pissed off.]
You've got that wrong!
[...wow, he is never stealing Naegi's lines again as that just felt awkward, but dear god, he's wanted to do that for a while.]
You're either extremely new at this or you're lying, Mr. Terrorist - if you're convinced that you're above justice itself, you wouldn't need to make demands! It's like you're expecting us to hand over the world; if you care so little and have so much power, why go through us first - unless our cooperation is necessary to your success!
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[At least not about his logic. The weather controlling device though? That’s a lie.]
You are also wrong about me requiring your cooperation. If I so wished, I could have put my plan into effect without any ssssort of warning or announcement. Wreaked untold destruction on any area of my choosing and watched idiots like you flee in droves.
But why not give people the chance to make the ssssmart choice for once and avoid such a fate? My victory is assured no matter what you do, so you only overessssstimate your own importance by thinking that I need your cooperation. Whether my demands are met or not only determines what shape the world is in when I make it mine! And nothing else!
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Although, uh, hang on. Hang on. Logical snag again. They keep cropping up.]
And how are a bunch of eggs supposed to help you take over the region? For all you know, even if we do cooperate, we'll send you a large amount of those...Weedles? I think that's what they're called.
You stand to gain a lot of worms or a world you have no interest in. And you're saying this is going to benefit you somehow...?
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It’s ssssimple. Once I receive the eggs, I’ll begin hatching them. Once hatched, each egg, no matter what it is, will be placed in a Cobra approved care program.
[Meaning he’ll be raising them because he lacks any minions who would do this for him.]
Once the program is complete, the Pokémon will be fully evolved and completely loyal to my every order. Then they will march on the world and overwhelm my enemies! If I am given an army of Weedles, then sssso be it! I will flood the world with an army of loyal Cobra operatives more than willing to sting anything that gets in their way!
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[Judging from his tone of voice, he really, really doesn't.]
While I think that you're being incredibly silly and believe that justice will have no difficulty prevailing, your faith in yourself is almost impressive - it's a shame you're using it in such a way!
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[...]
You really are being very silly, though!
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[............]
This is getting us nowhere, you know!
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[Can you guess who he's talking about, Ishimaru?]
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[PRESSING QUESTIONS WE ALL NEED ANSWERS TO.]
And what do you plan on doing if I don't?!
...this is going to be really awkward when Cobra finds out Ishimaru's a Rocket
[Please don't answer that.]
And you don't want to know where it's going to get you! Trust me!
I like to imagine they'll exchange a look like they showed up to a party wearing the same outfit.
I'm not sure which outfit would be more awkward here.
...thank you for that mental image of Ishimaru in Screaming Nineties Neon, I needed that.
You're welcome
[That's what Cobra actually believes anyway.]
Re: You're welcome
[Jeez, Cobra. If you're going to do this, do it like a man.]
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[Okay, shot with a Hyper Beam or something due to the lack of guns.]
When I decide, you’ll know!
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[Honestly, if he weren't so bad with social cues he'd be wondering if you were screwing with his head this entire time. However...]
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