42 | Video

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

[By now everything should be in place. All the bombs should have been planted and the package should be en route to or already in Ecruteak. So with everything ready and zero chance of failure, the Commander begins the video, showing himself sitting in the giant oversized snake throne he received for Christmas.]

Before I begin, I would like to clear up a misssconception from my last attack. That being the idea that I am without allies. What I have done today I could not have done alone. I’ll leave it to you people to figure out who could have helped me with sssssuch a thing.

And what thing is that you ask? It’s sssimple really. I said that if my demands weren’t met, there would be more attacks, and they definitely were not meant. And thissss is no gas attack, no this is something worse. Much worse!

[The Commander gets up and grabs something from off camera, before sitting down again. After taking his seat, he holds it up to the camera. It’s a very ordinary looking remote.]

A ssssingle use of this remote will detonate the bombs my associates have placed in the Game Corner unless my demands are met! Cede Cianwood City to me and place a bag with one million dollars the HM for Fly on the roof of the Department Store within the next 24 hours or your precioussss casino gets reduced to rubble!

[The Commander starts laughing, only to stop after a minute and point his finger towards the camera.]

And to those of you who think you’ll stop me, don’t even try it! Not if you value your lives! As we ssspeak one of you is about to be dealt with! And he doesn't even know it! Sssso stay away from the Game Corner or you’ll be next!

Comments

[Private video]

[meatysoviet]

Do you really think this will work?

[He really is curious.]

[Private video]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

What kind of question is that? Of course it's going to work!

[Unlike last time, he's expecting to get what he wants. Or at least some of it.]

[Video]

[infinitejustice]

That's...that's utterly despicable! Stop endangering innocent people, you bastard!

[Video]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

Innocents? I don't care about innocents! Give me what I want or I'll blow them all to ssssmithereens!

[VIDEO] - LOCKED

[brilliantideas]

[The video opens up to Wheatley clapping. He looks quite pleased.]

Excellent work! You created the explosives? Well done!

[A pause.]

Are you working with Team Rocket, or is this something you're doing on your own? I was hoping this Team Rocket business would get interesting, but so far I've seen nothing.

[He's attempting to be careful not to reveal his affiliation - but if you've been in the labs down there, Cobra, you should recognize the background in the video.]

Do you think you'll get away with this? I mean if you do blow up the casino. I imagine it would be difficult. To escape from Goldenrod after a stunt like that. Oh, but of course you're not in the city, right? Right, of course. That would be ridiculous.

[What is this moving around thing anyway? He's still not used to it.]

[VIDEO] - LOCKED

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

[He definitely recognizes those surroundings, but…

Oh dear. A Rocket that doesn’t know his name. What’s the most tactful way to handle this? Yelling at them, of course.]

I am Cobra Commander! You may consider me your commanding officer!

And no, I did not create the explosives. We happen to have sssome highly talented bomb makers among our ranks. As to how, I’ll escape from Goldenrod…I’m not going to! I’m right here in the base! And they’ll never find me! Isn’t that brilliant?

[not there]

[tapestodiane]

<sub>[Coop eyes the feed grimly, but quickly decides not to respond to it. For one, Cobra has often proved difficult to reason with, and he has a distinct feeling he won't get far this time either.]

[Second, the Game Corner is not far from his location, and threats or no threats, he'll be going there to start getting people out. The locals aren't tuned in to the Network, and others might not have seen this yet. The less people there when things go down, the better.]</sub>

video;

[ex_cashcow493]

So it has come to this again. [ Not a wise idea to make an enemy out of Saber of all people, but she can't ignore this. ] I shall stop you without hesitance on this very day.

video;

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

You again? Are you trying to get on my bad side?

[He snickers. He's really not scared. At all.]

[Video]

[soggypastry]

Do I have to remind you what happened the last time you threatened this place? You didn't get what you wanted. This won't be any different.

['sup, Cobra. Remember that person who kind of sort tricked you into calling yourself stupid? Yeah, that's this woman glaring at you. Pink hair kinda lessens the intimidation factor, doesn't it?]

[Video]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

[The pink hair's not really a factor for him. Given some of his minions back home and his own face, he really has no business judging someone else's appearance.]

I don't remember hearing from you before, but it will be different! Or the Game Corner and everyone inside will be wiped off the map!

[Video]

[tinymoonkid]

You're doin' something like this again, Lame Dude?

[Video]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

My name is not Lame Dude! It's Cobra Commander! And yessss, I am doing something like this again!

[video]

[combat_butler]

... Are you serious? I didn't think villains who looked straight out of a sentai show used bombs of all things... And I always figured the Game Corner was run by a bunch of Yakuza types... Isn't it a really bad idea to threaten that place?

[video]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

A what?

[He has no idea what that is.]

Ugh, nevermind! Of course, I'll use bombs! I'll use whatever it takes to achieve my goals! And the Yakuza? Hah! I'm hardly scared of them!

[In his world biker gangs, Yakuza members, and the like weren't even his henchmen. They were closer to being his henchmen's henchmen.]

[video]

[impulsives]

...And what do you think will make us bend down just for you, huh?

[video]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

You will if you know what's good for you!

[Video]

[subtlecoruscate]

Seems a little extreme for some money and a HM.

[Video]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

I also asked for a city. You must have missssed that part.

[Video]

[saltwaterwounds]

Oh, the game corner? I've never been there before! Is it really important?

[Video]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

It's important in that it's often filled with people and money. Making it the perfect place to hold hostage!

[video]

[empireofmymind]

You sent that package?!

[Never mind that he doesn't actually know who you are way to be oblivious, Ken, or that he's nowhere near you, or that the context of most of this flies over his head.

You are being glared at by an eleven-year-old boy.]

How could you? Why? No one'd ever deserve something like that!

[video]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

Oh, so it's already arrived? That's wonderful!

[He's just going to laugh. The glaring face does nothing to ruin his mood.]

I wish I could have seen the look on his face when he opened it!

[video] wow this isn't late at all

[darkenedgales]

... You can't be fucking serious.

[Except after that last time, Crow wouldn't put it past this guy to actually do this... and he doesn't find it a fun concept at all.]

[video] It's fashionably late :]

[cobraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa]

Of course I'm sssserious! I'm always serious!